In a departure from my usual posts of recent times I have decided to write something completely different today. As I was putting my four and a half year old to bed last night he asked me for a story and then I remembered something...

And it is what has inspired today's post.

Some twenty years ago, on a damp day I found myself wandering around the Sokol Hills near Olszytn Czestochowa in Poland. Although it had rained recently it had stopped and the air was full of the smell of damp loam. I was there with a girl I called "Magda Metal" because her name was Magda and I met her in the toilet of a heavy metal bar that I used to frequent. 

But that is another story for another day!

So there we were walking around and we suddenly came across a big hole in the ground and a man called Pawel. He quickly explained that he had just qualified as a caving instructor and asked us if we wanted to go down. I was somewhat reluctant as I have a bit of an aversion to dirt, but I didn't want to lose face and because Magda was already keen I readily agreed.

I always thought the name of the cave was something like Studnia (Polish for [water] well) or "Studniowka" (which is a high school prom), but have never been able to find out for sure. In profile the cave must have looked something like this representative image I drew a few minutes ago:

Before I could barely blink, Pawel had wrapped a rope around a tree and secured it to some handy metal railings to make it safe and Magda was already harnessed up and ready to go. She went down quickly and efficiently and Pawel pulled the rope, complete with the harness back up. Now it was my turn and soon I too launched myself over the edge and effectively abseiled down the side of the cave shaft. It was actually quite easy with a small metal lever in my hand that acted as a break. I don't know how deep it was but would probably estimate 15 metres. Pawel soon joined us and asked if we wanted to explore further. He explained that there was another smaller sub-cave, but it would require a bit of a scramble to get up to it. Magda was up for it but I didn't much fancy getting muddied up so I said I would wait.

Then they were gone and alone now I suddenly realised how cold it was in the cave and was keen to return to the surface where the light was already beginning to fade. In fairness Pawel and Magda must have been ten minutes at the most before they returned and then it was time to ascend before the light completely faded.

Pawel quickly put Magda back into the harness while explaining what she needed to do and then she was off. I am not joking when I say she was out in about a minute. Then once again it was my turn and as he had with Magda, Pawel explained what I needed to do, in Polish of course. I thought I understood and I thought I had some idea intuitively of what I thought I should do. After all coming down had been dead easy.

And then I started. I grabbed the rope with both hands and started to haul myself up and got stuck almost immediately. Incidentally, I had never mastered rope climbing when I was at school and so it didn't bode well. Within seconds I couldn't hold on and I let go, rather than slip and get a rope burn.  Pawel tried to explain again and once more I tried, with the same result. Pawel again illustrated what I needed to do with some agitated leg actions and I tried to copy but was still relying on my arms, so I was getting nowhere. I even tried to jump a bit further up the rope to get some height as a kickstart, but that too resulted in me returning to my starting point, the only difference being from a slightly higher position.

At some point the silhouette of  Magda's head appeared against the now almost black sky and asked where we were.

I tried and I tried and just couldn't get moving for what felt like was forever, but must have been at least half an hour. Pawel, remained calm, but I was on the verge of giving up and telling him that the emergency services would have to be called to get me out. I genuinely believed that I would never leave the cave under my own steam. I was never afraid, I just simply lacked the capability to get out.

Pawel, ever patient Pawel, tried to explain again and then I had another go and suddenly it clicked. I had been relying on my arms and I should have been using my legs.

Very simply, each foot was in a loop in the rope and what I should have been doing is lift a leg, complete with the looped rope before locking the rope with a metal clasp. Then with it secure I needed to push off it almost like the rung of a ladder and then repeat the same with my other leg which now was raised to a higher position than my first leg, before again locking the second loop. Then I would release the first rope and lift my first leg again completely with the hoop before locking it once again in a higher position which I could again push off from. Then by alternating I would make my ascent and I must confess after such struggle it was actually really easy once I got it. The only difficulty that remained was getting around a natural bulge in the rock face as it meant my legs had to leave the relative security of being against the cave wall, but now I knew what I was doing it was no longer an insurmountable challenge.

Then suddenly I too was out, in fact I was almost as fast as Magda had been, assuming you count from the time I had stopped flailing uselessly and actually started climbing.

It was an experience and I am pleased, looking back, that I had done it, but the truth is that caving is definitely not for me and it is not something I am likely to ever repeat unless I absolutely have to.

As always stay safe and well my friends.