While scrolling through YouTube tonight, I came across a video titled "Why Can't I Be a Rabbi?"  Times being what they are, I thought it said, "Why Can't I Be a Rabbit?"  There must have been some Jewish symbology on the thumbnail, because my second thought was, "Because a rabbi is a gathering of multiple rabbits."  It is commonly known that the plural form of homunculus is homunculi, that multiple Elvis impersonators can be referred to as a gathering of Elvi, and that it takes more than one rabbit to comprise a rabbi.

Here are several rabbi, dancing on the sidewalk in a sacrilegious display of solidarity with the Ostara Bunny, who is the cultural ambassador for the fertility cult of Ostara, a West Germanic spring goddess.  It is believed that the rabbi consumed the pagan chocolate supplied by the ambassador, without even asking once if it was Kosher.  In strict adherence to the punishments described in the Torah, the 2 offending rabbi were subjected to 39 lashes, and sent on their way.

Here's a fluffle of rabbi hanging out in the synagogue, waiting for the Messiah.

Archaeologists believe that rabbi in the ancient world executed criminals by tickling them to death, and that the uncontrollable laughter of the condemned man rang through the streets like a nude comedian high on methamphetamines.  The sound of death was like a streaker running through the ears of ancient citizens of Jerusalem.  Occasionally, a depressed citizen would commit "suicide by rabbi," the ancient, Talmudic equivalent of "suicide by cop," just so they could feel something light and humorous again.  Suicide by rabbi was a popular, lighthearted way to go.  Ancient citizens believed that death in this manner absolved the condemned man from judgment in the afterlife, since there's no way anyone who died laughing themselves to death could ever go to hell.

It was just too cute.

Since this belief did not line up with the view presented in the Torah, the rabbi eventually started stoning people to death.  Suicidal ideation and crimes such as believing Jesus is the Messiah dropped significantly as these changes were implemented across the kingless kingdom.

On a serious note, I'm a believer in the Pre-Trib rapture, and that "The Great Tribulation," or "The Time of Jacob's Trouble," as it is actually called, is precisely that.  The time of Jacob's trouble.  Meaning Jews.  Anyone who accepts Christ as the Messiah right now, whether Jewish or not, becomes a Christian, regardless of their ethnicity, race, heritage, hair color, or any other trait.  No one is exempt, and to become a Christian is to become a new person entirely, by virtue of being forgiven, without having to jump through any religious hoops.

The reason I bring it up is because of the videos below.  I am genuinely shocked at the treatment these Christians are receiving at the hands of people whose only real point of contention is that Jesus is the Christ.  It doesn't seem like a point worth knocking people down over.  It's surprisingly liberal behaviour.  There's nothing "live and let live" about it.  It's hostile, and aggressive.

These videos affirm my belief in a Pre-Trib rapture, because there's no similarity between the street preachers and the people violently shoving them to the ground, or hitting them from behind with a heavy backpack.  From my unscholarly understanding of the end times, the reason for "The Tribulation" is to humble the Jewish people (and anyone who realizes they were left behind), so that a remnant will be saved.  If you're shoving women to the ground for preaching that Jesus is the Messiah, and if God considers you His chosen people, and if Jesus is God, then He's going to deal with you.

It's going to be rough.

Better to take off the Easter Rabbi suit, put down the chocolate fertility rites and legalistic dietary laws, and walk away from religion altogether.  Religion is obsolete.  Has been for 2,000 years.  We don't need to consult a bunch of rabbits with weird clothes to know the truth.  The Bible doesn't stop at the Book of Deuteronomy.  Nobody watches Michael's rise to power in The Godfather, and pretends he wasn't the head of the Corleone family in the subsequent films.  Nobody denies the existence of the Godfather sequels.  So how can you watch all three Godfather movies, and ignore the New Testament?  

I don't get it.

Repent now, everybody, please.  The Antichrist isn't going to be tickling people to death.  It's going to be horrific.  I don't think this lady or her friends are going to be around for it.  I pray to be counted worthy to escape the coming wrath on a near-daily basis myself, if not daily.  Regular and recurring, at least.  I think the people in these videos will look back at these moments with incredulous despair.  If they're lucky.  They won't be able to believe they were capable of such arrogance and disdain.

If they're lucky.  Which many of them will be.  God bless them all, and you as well.  I'm horrified of the high horse of disdain that these videos tempt me to get up on.  There's no time for that.  I've heard it said that the reason (or one of the reasons) the Bible tells us to bless our enemies is to set us free from the curse of that disdain.  It doesn't necessarily have anything to do with them.  It might, but not necessarily.

So God bless these people.  Who am I to curse anybody, anyway.  What am I... Forgiven?  Does that sound like a curse to you?

It doesn't sound like one to me.

Thanks for listening.