I also fell in love once... virtually...!
Every time I entered virtuality, I was filled with excitement and a sense of euphoria! When I was texting HIM, my hands were shaking!
He offered to meet me, but I was scared...! It's scary that all my fantasies, the whole created image will come to naught and, in my soul, there will only be a feeling of disappointment and sadness, and I would hate it so much!
He was scared too, but we got carried away with each other... he texted: "Everything will be fine with us, and the first meeting and everything else - if fate wills!"
And so, I finally decided to have the first meeting...
We saw each other..., chatted, laughed..., I had an incomprehensible feeling of fear, embarrassment.... But still, I think we had a good time together. Then there was a second meeting, a third....
I was falling in love again...! I wanted to write to HIM about IT, SHOUT to the whole world about how HAPPY I AM! I had SO MANY unspent emotions, I wanted to give IT ALL to him!
...THAT was the only THING THAT scared HIM!
Later, I realized that he didn't need ME to fall in LOVE at all.
I tried to develop this relationship, I didn't sleep at night, I cried, I thought: what is the right thing to do, what thread to pull, why does everything come to naught?
Yes, it was a "STRANGE" man. But I JUST wanted TO LIVE for HIM, make HIM happy at least sometimes, smile at HIM, talk to HIM.
I just REALLY wanted IT!
And he killed quietly and calmly all this!
Why did you do that? Why did you trample ON MY FEELINGS, DESTROY EVERYTHING that I tried so hard to do for YOU?!
The passion has passed.... He got what he needed. He's probably reasserting himself once again.
I thought about it a lot and constantly and couldn't understand: why did IT happen like this?
And the worst part was that I BLAMED MYSELF for EVERYTHING and justified him!!!
PS:
I want EVERYONE to be happy, but this is only possible when paired with another person! Become as one! Strive for IT!
Complement each other, support each other, appreciate each other, find compromises, and YOU will succeed!
Published earlier on 08/07/2024
© Copyright: Vladimir Yevtushenko 3, 2024
Certificate of Publication No. 224080700988
