Bitcoins and US hundred dollar bills by David McBee on Pexels
"Earn $500 USD or more a day, all while working from home. Little to no experience or skills required! Hi there, stranger! I'm Clifford John Pickle and I've earned thousands of dollars already, despite starting only three weeks ago, thanks to discovering an incredible financial life hack! Here's how: [Obligatory suspicious shortlink that could lead anywhere, without context]"
I'm sure you've seen plenty of comments like that all over the Web (mainly for-pay blogging sites and user groups). It's hard not to, since they're almost invariably left by bogus bot accounts masquerading as legitimate users.
Almost nobody of whom I know uses other people's shortlinks, all while fully expecting others to use theirs (myself included); they can't be trusted to go where the person providing them claims that they do. That's why almost nobody uses invite/referral links when creating an account on a Website (unless the only way to gain access is strictly by invitation/referral only, mainly to keep the scammers and spammers out, ironically). They even have names like Clifford J. Pickle, Cameron McFuckface, Greta McWhorter the Squirter or Tits McGee (whom presumably lives in/on Titty Hilly or Boobs Lake and conducts farcical aquatic ceremonies whilst clad in the finest shimmering sheer samite, no less). The last two are probably more likely to be promoting the perks of being a cam girl or adult entertainer on Only Fans or amateur porn star on Pornhub, though, but still you get the point (or maybe they do, if you know what I mean) ... I've even seen fake job postings on sites like LinkedIn and Upwork (usually with a Telegram/WhatsApp number instead of a Shortlink, since they're harder to detect and redact), although those have the dubious virtue of being more well-constructed/presented. The kicker that gives them away is that they don't post any articles or other content; their activity consists entirely of the exact same comment posted hundreds of times on a multitude of posts, most of which are completely unrelated to the suspect proposition.
Anyway, the point I'm making is that, no matter how hard these knucklehead idiots try to make the content of their bots' spam comments look convincing, they mostly fail miserably, because most of us are not as green as we are cabbage-looking. The Maths simply doesn't add up and the logic's a bit thin. If you're really genuinely busy raking in as much cheddar (or maybe Roquefort) as you claim, through a legitimate life hack, why are you promoting it (and very badly at that) to other people, particularly on a for-pay blogging Website where people earn maybe a couple of dollars a day at most? Do you really think we're that greedy, gullible and stupid? Do you really expect us to be so easily taken in by your piss-poor and spammy scammy efforts? Do they ever work out for you?
Maybe I'm just an old man yelling at clouds or kids to get off his lawn whilst waving a shotgun, but give me a break (a proper one with realistic earnings), man! Otherwise, piss off and shut down your bot so that it leaves our posts' comment section alone, Chris Crocker! It's that easy, m'kay?! M'Kay!
Alisha J. Hessler AKA Jasmine Tridevil, with her prosthetic triple breasts // Photo from Huffington Post
It's even less convincing a story than that of Jasmine Tridevil (real name Alisha J. Hessler), whom created a hoax about getting cosmetic surgery to add a third breast, ala Total Recall ...
