A While ago, while looking at the religious books (mainly about the history and mythology of Abrahamic religion and its ties to Paganism) on PDF Drive, I came across a volume of nonsense titled Chemtrails are Satanic Demonic Witchcraft, Exposing the Satanic Cult that Runs the World, published by Chemtrails are Demonic. How that got grouped in with the other books, I don't know, but I felt compelled to read it to see just how stupidly and laughably delusional it is. Here follow some ridiculous extracts, for your amusement:

Why is it always the religious folks that are most susceptible to ridiculous conspiracy theory nonsense? Is it perhaps because they've already been indoctrinated with some bullshit about a magical and mythical invisible sky wizard with nothing better to do than watch over them to make sure they never learn any better and denounce such delusions, sending demons after those that don't conform?

To start with, before even getting into the book proper ... Instead of embedding a link to a video in question, the author has taken a number of screenshots from it and placed them in sequence.

Like all conspiracy theory pundits, the author claims to be telling "truths" that brainwashers wish to suppress (which is a classic brainwashing tactic), by taking down the site. According to this demented and delusional individual, the following should be known:

• Chemtrails are demonic.
• The clouds "they" [(the faceless and nameless "they", of course)] spray are also demonic.
• The Hum, heard worldwide, is demonic. [Methinks somebody has a bad case of tinnitus from listening to too much so-called "Christian Rock".]
• These phenomena are interconnected and interrelated.
• "They" are part of a Satanic operation to control and, ultimately, destroy you. [Satanism is about freedom and embracing one's humanity. Abrahamic religion, on the other hand, is about control and suppression ...]
• Even if you don't believe this, you and the people you love will be affected. [Ah, a good dose of fear-mongering to drive the message home. Noice!]
• Prayers and songs to Jesus Christ can completely stop them. [You know how effective these things have previously been against scientific progress one doesn't understand, right?]

"All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident."
 — Arthur Schopenhauer

Clearly, the author of this book of hogwash is stuck on one of the first two stages, since there are no such things as chemtrails. Contrails, on the other hand, are clouds of harmless droplets of steam made by water vapor condensing around aerosols released by/from jet engines ...

Chemtrails are demons and can be defeated through prayer to Jesus Christ.

According to the author, the "chemtrails" will disappear if you pray to Jesus long enough. Clearly, this individual is unaware that contrails evaporate naturally, regardless of what you do. If you watch them long enough, you can see this happening. Also, planes are not demons waiting around to spray poisons or posses you. They're usually carrying people and/or cargo to other places; of course they fly off.

"A more accurate name for the chemtrails would be demon trails, or demonic trails."

Um, no, Cletus! A more accurate name would be contrails, the main chemicals therein being water and, maybe, a bit of carbon monoxide. Perhaps you should do some research, get your facts straight and stop writing gibberish.

"Those responsible need an explanation to the average person as to why the spray appears. The plane illusion settles it in most people's minds, convincing them that these are normal planes. They go back to daily life, not knowing what is really going on. Younger generations may not even remember the beautiful blue sky that people enjoyed before these things started spraying the sky over a decade ago."

As I stated previously, there's nothing demonic about them or the planes from which they come. The planes are also real, not holographic projections or demons. (If you knew anything about perspective, refraction and reflection of light, you'd know that projecting holograms into the sky by some shadowy organisation would be a waste of its time.) Occam's razor, mate, Occam's razor. Don't cut yourself with it.

I've just given you a reasonable explanation. I remember what the sky looked like a decade ago. There were also jets, planes and contrails. This is not a new phenomenon. Idiots having unbridled access to the Internet and the means and unrestrained freedom to publish whatever gumpf occurs to them, however, very much is. It started almost two decades ago and has been gathering steam ever since.

Honestly, we could be done here and move on. However, since you've gone rabbiting on for about one hundred and twenty pages (a small novel or informative book, by my reckoning; a veritable waste of energy, space and time), let me pour derision and scorn on some more of it. I'm particularly interested in finding out what this "Hum" nonsense is, since that's a new one to me.

"If every Christian would use their spiritual weapons, the keys of the Kingdom, to pray shorthand prayers without ceasing to bind the demons and loose God's angels to attack, the chemtrails would not be the problem they are today."

Again, no, Cletus! If everyone who believes conspiracy theories would actually bother to do some proper research into the truth of the claims and understand basic scientific principles (instead of mindlessly consuming Youtube videos and blog posts devoid of facts and merit), conspiracy theorists (and their theories) would not be the problem they are today. Chumps like yourself wouldn't write one-hundred-plus page idiotic screeds about things that aren't in any way harmful or problematic.

"The real enemy on earth is, and always has been, Satan, his demons, and the humans who allow themselves to be possessed by them. For a little power and wealth at the expense of much suffering and pain for the rest of humanity, they do their best to keep this knowledge hidden from the masses, taking as many people to hell with them as possible."

Hmm. I have to disagree on that. Satan has never bothered me in the slightest, perhaps because he doesn't fucking exist! Christians going around spreading their baseless and false beliefs, trying to ram it down everybody's throats and condemning/judging people for simply minding their own business and not accepting The One Twue Way of Jesus Christ and Yahweh, on the other hand, have very much been a big problem for me (and continue to be so).

Knowledge is power. It should be shared among everybody, for their betterment. Perhaps you forget that, according to the Christian narrative, your god views this as a bad thing. It was Satan who, allegedly offered it to humans in the first place, resulting in Yahweh banishing them from Eden. Ever since, your lot have displayed a tendency to be rather keen on spurning knowledge. No doubt, that's how you've arrived at the premise that was the impetus for writing and publishing the drivel which I am here rebutting.

Things the Author of that Fiction Believes About Chemtrails

• The chemtrail phenomenon is a Satanic operation. The chemtrails are not natural planes. A huge, shadowy network of covens and Satanic groups exists in this world. They are responsible for these actions. Humans in the dark kingdom take their orders from Satan and his demons. [Apply Occam's razor, mate. It's just too ludicrous to be true.]
• Chemtrails are a type of demonic delivery system. The occult world is working hard every day to drop demons overhead in the form of demonic clouds. These entities are summoned and sent by Satanists. They are not real planes, but likely some form of occult technology, delivering their payload of demons to your area in an attempt for complete takeover by the dark kingdom. The spray and resulting white clouds they emit are not natural condensation or a form of geo-engineering. They are demonic. Their goal is to get the demons into your body in order to control you. [I'm not that familiar with the finer points of demonology, but I'm pretty sure they come from under the earth's crust and angels from above it. You seem awfully confused about this, assuming that such things are real (which, of course, they're not.)]
• The so-called planes are, in reality, delivering demons. Some chemtrail planes have a huge amount [sic] of demons to transport and drop over our heads. The longer the tail of the chemtrail, the more demons are being distributed over our world. The demonic spray can be defeated through persistence in prayer, as they fly across the sky, if we learn shorthand prayers and how to pray without ceasing. [The planes are real, doofus. The demons aren't. Prayer achieves nothing that doesn't happen naturally. You're wasting your time and energy over nothing, just as I am in lampooning you.]
• The spray and trails they lay down are demonic spirits that seem to gain power and energy from the sun. [(Again, the mysterious and nameless "they" are doing insidious things. I'm not sure what else to write about this, so I'm just going to grin at the blatantly evident stupidity presented here.)]
• Jesus Christ told us exactly how to deal with this through binding and loosing [whatever that means, maybe it is explained later in the book]. You must bind the strongman, and then spoil his house. Fear not, "for the LORD made me have dominion over the mighty." [I haven't read the bible closely, but I'm certain it doesn't mention planes, chemtrails or contrails, given that it was written almost two millennia ago (even if John the Revelator made some seriously potent bootleg moonshine and had one hell of a bad trip, about which he wrote and tried to pass off as revelations).]

No credible sources are cited for these assertions, of course. Hence, I don't feel the need to do that in response; it'd be a waste of effort and no doubt disavowed as "the global conspiracy of scientists who're all in on it" (or whatever the copy-pasta rhetoric is, spouted by the willfully ignorant). Besides, I'm not aiming to do anything more than be scornful and poke fun. I realise that actually attempting to make a serious counter-argument in the face of such stupidity is ultimately a frustrating and futile endevour. Besides, I can't bring myself to mount a serious defense against someone who obviously didn't hire a proofreader and allowed serious grammatical errors to remain when going to print.

Mate, praying is ineffectual against "chemtrails". Everybody who knows anything about them knows that spraying vinegar into the air, when they appear, is more effective. It also has the advantage of killing all the plant life in the general vicinity, which you can blame on the chemtrails when people doubt your claims. I know of a dilly old woman who swears by it. If that's not good enough for you, then rest assured that I saw it on Youtube, the oracle and vector of "truth" for conspiracy theorists around the globe (flatards included, ironically).

Happy travels on the Internet, folks. Just be sure to stay away from planes (and especially clouds, such as Google's awhile you're at it ... :P XD

Post photo copyright Susan Gallagher