You Laugh, But These Two Have the Nuclear Football!

Twitter Accuses Joe Biden of Lusting after his Daughter, Tiffany Trump

SAN FRANCISCO - Right-wing Twitter users accused Democratic Presidential nominee Joe Biden of lusting after his own daughter, Tiffany Trump.

"Just look at the way Biden rests his hand on Tiffany's leg," Twitter user InCellBlock69 tweeted.

The hashtag #JoeTheRapist trended on Thursday evening shortly after President Donald Trump's DNA was announced to be due for the E Jean Carroll case.

"Biden called our soldiers losers and suckers!" Twitter user NotABot10110 tweeted.

Tensions ran high Thursday evening, with Twitter users from each side condemning Biden, Trump, or both men at once.

"Biden tied Penelope Pitstop to the train tracks! If it weren't for the Anthill Mob performing a last-minute rescue, she'd be street pizza!" Twitter user ProL-Life Killa tweeted.

Multiple factors, including reduced polling places, the current state of the USPS, and accusations of election rigging from Trump himself, have many questioning if the election will be a fair representation of the nation's will.

"Biden gathered all six Infinity Stones and wiped out half of all life in the universe! And then he farted!" Twitter user DarkseidIsBestMarvelVillain tweeted.

When reached for comment, Trump said, "I remember when Slidin' Biden misspelled 'cofveve.' I remember when Jivin' Biden talked about airports in the Revolutionary War. I remember when Multiplyin' Biden guest-starred in 'Home Alone 2' with My Collie Caulk Gun. That was the best caulk gun. No one could caulk block that caulk gun. Ker-bayang!"

Democratic Vice-Presidential candidate Kamala Harris turned to Biden and asked, "We're campaigning against Trump for this?!?"

"It's a fixer-upper," Biden mumbled.

Meanwhile, Ted Cruz continued to argue with an imaginary cow... and lose the argument handily.

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I have 15 years of experience as a software tester. I've been writing off-and-on for 28 years. I adapt quickly to new technologies and new methodologies. And I believe that humor is the most important social skill.

The Loony Liberal's Lampoonery
The Loony Liberal's Lampoonery

The main purpose of this blog is to deliver zany comedy to its readers. There will be occasions, though, where I'll address topics with more seriousness. This blog will include satire, parody, cultural references, and other scribbles that will make you question my sanity.

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