Too Long Makes a Write, Am I Right?

Answering a Twitter Question: The Sources of my Writing

Earlier today, I did a meme-ish thing on Twitter: I urged people to ask me questions and swore to answer them as completely as possible without revealing PII.

My boss and online friend, Bree Ann, had the following question for me:

The short answer is: "It depends."

The long answer goes back to my high school days, where I discovered Dave Barry. I was hooked. I read his columns, bought his books, and watched his short-lived TV show, "Dave's World." Naturally, I tried to emulate his style. My results were hit-and-miss.

My next major writing effort was fanfiction. I did a lot of alt-fic and round-robin fics. I'm proud of the work I did for "Reforming Evil Can Be Tricky." As for the rest... the less said, the better.

Currently, my writing can be divided into three categories: my attempts on here and on Twitter to build my online brand(s), the professional work I do for Bree Ann and Three Gen Media, and my personal projects, each with their different motivations:

  • Big Sister Monogatari: This game will be a mix between Undertale and Ikaruga, with the protagonists employing a variety of techniques to cope with the increasing bullet hell that the enemies throw at them. As for the story itself, most of the plot came to me in a dream. It crosses over with other of my storylines, and some party allies and NPCs are homages to online users.
  • Chaos and BluesNerima Daikon Brothers meets Glee meets Moulin Rouge in Las Vegas! All I need are five hammy, harmonius crooners -- two females and three males -- and it will be showtime!
  • The Christmas Capers: The inspiration behind this game was the "Hunter: The Reckoning" White Wolf video games. Yes, the games were a real grind, especially without the use of special weapons, but I was hooked. As for the story, it started with one co-worker walking a drunk (off of plain orange juice) friend home when they're swarmed by killer toys. The rest of the cast soon followed, with some shout-outs to Stan Freberg and a heavily-buffed Santa Claus.
  • The Greatest Power: This is a hodge-podge of Wandaba Style, a way to honor my uncle, and a bit of my personal life mixed inwards. Since it happens relatively early in the The Stewards and the Sinners timeline, I'll have to write it soon. I'm not looking forward to the bad memories it will dredge up.
  • Harlot's Honor: The original concept for this story was six female bounty hunters in 32nd-century Australia in a Sunset Riders-style game. But then, I realized that I live in North America, where mass shootings are practically a daily occurrence.  That's when I decided that an 32nd-century Australian brothel would be less controversial and triggering. The great thing is that the six female leads are largely unchanged (as are their special abilities and preferred weapons), and writing for the bombastic, arrogant Madeline the Wise -- a goblin who can be described as an explodeysexual -- is going to be a hell of a lot of fun.
  • Head-Turner and the Hooligan: Role-playing as Jonwyn Joyhaven wasn't all bad. I had some good experiences and good memories before 8 months of the Smashverse being ass-hats turned me off of role-play permanently. I decided to keep Jonwyn, but rewrite his story. I also kept some of the characters from his original story, though most of the cast will be original (or as original as homages to Jon Oliver, Lewis Black, Dan Avidan, and Arin Hanson can be). If I write this correctly, this will be like Bo-bobo with sex scenes.
  • The Heroine of her Beloved's Stories: The inspirations behind this game are Magician Lord's transformation mechanic, Mega Man's acquiring enemy weapons, a dash of Metroidvania exploring, and some of Sarah MacLaughlan's songs. Spoiler alert: with the exception of a demon that functions as the playable character's left arm, all of the characters with dialogue will be female.
  • Horned-ey on Main Street: My online friend babyblue8 inspired this Las Vegas ecchi tale. I'll have to rework it to factor in the coronavirus, but if I have the story start around 2024, then hopefully it won't be unrealistic to think that there will be some semblance of back-to-normal by then.
  • It Takes All Types: Take Law and Order, move it to Vegas, then add dashes of supernatural and slapstick. What inspired me was a dream where Detective Briscoe teamed up with a werewolf to catch Snow White's murderer and find a way to awaken Snow White. (I also had a dream about the cast of Whose Line is it Anyways? lampooning Law and Order, but that dream's unrelated to my story.
  • The Jewels of the Desert: What prompted me to start this tale was a combination of dreams and exposure to some well-done teen-superhero shows such as Static Shock! Yes, the foci will be action and comedy, but there will be plenty of slice-of-life and general teen problems.
  • Jamming Mamas: This story was inspired by my urge to find 5-6 30-to-50-year-old women, buy them instruments, buy them music lessons, then have them rock out. Until I can afford such an expenditure, I'll write this as one of my Vegas series.
  • Justice Yawns, But Never SleepsNight Court inspired this Vegas series. Some of my favorite episodes of Night Court involved the supernatural or the impossible; Judge Stone delivering a sentence to Wile E. Coyote is canon. That's the type of mood I'd like to bring to this series. Yes, there will be serious topics and some ripped-from-the-headlines tales, but the main thrust will be oddball humor.
  • Kali Led from Behind: Current events prompted most of this story, in which Kali tries to massacre non-humans by inciting humans to violence. Current events will play heavily into both Kali's tactics and the friction between the six heroines who have vowed to stop her.
  • Loyalty and Menagerie: The original concept was a blind swordsman and his talking dog discovering a mischievous genie and her three servants. However, the inspiration behind the genie turned out to be a Smashverser who figuratively backstabbed me, so time for a page-one rewrite! Victor Pendragon -- the blind swordsman -- is now a lovelaire wielder (a lovelaire is like a keyblade, only with far fewer plotholes -- I'll repost about lovelaires in the future), and his parents have hired three maids to serve him, each with their own unique personalities and agendas. And if I have my way, this will be a musical series.
  • My First Love is an MC in an Ecchi Harem Series: Deconstructing tropes is fun! That's why Uncle Yo! is one of my favorite comedians. Every time I saw him perform in a convention, I laughed myself silly. Once I have a few e-books for this Vegas series published, I hope that I can get him to voice the character for which I paid him homage. And yes, I plan to be heavy-handed with this, such as tsundere, yandere, theredere, noonesdere, and doubledogdere.
  • Our Vampire: Well, Jeremy Sproika has been an OC in my mind since my high-school days. Our Vampire is the story in which I finally placed him. I can't say for certain what inspired the other OCs except for Merrill the Magnificent, who is what Borderlands' Handsome Jack would be if he were half the hero he thought he was... and a magic-user to boot.
  • Passion Pushes the Pen: The main focus of this series is that most porn with "plot" is flat-out silly. NTR is essentially "Bad guy violates woman until she loves him." That's like saying, "Bank robber robs bank until bank awards him 10% interest compounded monthly." I admit that some of Sativa's works are very much Author-on-Board, but if I can make them funny, I'll spare myself the guilt. Also, since this may be the first public e-book series for The Stewards and the Sinners, I hope to explain -- both directly and sublty -- some of the world's mechanics, as well as introduce one or two major villains who take notice of Sativa and her friends.
  • Pink Beagles Monogatari: Think Avengers or Justice League meets Nin nin ga Shinobuden. A group of diverse public superheroes defend San Fransisco from threats ranging from serious (Kendra Dommini, a major villainess) to silly (burping goblins armed with empty pillowcases). I would do almost anything to cross this series over with BlazBlue or Hazbin Hotel for the season one finale.
  • The Second Chance Vlog: I used to have an idea for a massive role-play/interactive project called The Viceroys of Vegas. I've scrapped it, but I kept one character: E. V. Hawley, a mysterious, slightly-amnesiac man struggling with guilt and a past that's not ready to let him go. A combination of new OCs and OCs from The Viceroys of Vegas should be enough to get a few e-books, if not a few animated episodes.
  • Tweet, You Sinners!: The driving force behind this e-book series is the sheer number of false evangelicals that have harangued me for 27 years because I'm not [insert any religion here]. At this point in my life, I consider no cow sacred, so I will gleefully attempt to use the false evangelicals' own words against them. Spaghetti Monster help me if I'm wrong.
  • The Wife, the Husband, the Boyfriend, and the Girlfriend: In the world of The Stewards and the Sinners, polygamy is a common practice since women outnumber the men 3:1. Also, elves are generally less possessive than monogamous races such as humans and conservative orc clans. However, I realize that treating multi-partner relationships as fine and dandy is unrealistic, so I outlined this tale to demonstrate some problems and pitfalls with open relationships.
  • World-End AcceleratorsBlazBlue was the inspiration behind this fighting game concept. My plan was to create four factions, define characters for each faction, then let the characters' goals, histories, and previous interactions drive the plots and subplots. I've clearly defined roughly half of the characters involved.

...I told you it was a long answer.

In October, I hope to have enough time and stability to work on some of these projects again. I'm especially eager to get volume one of Tweet, You Sinners! and volume one of Passion Pushes the Pen: Drawn to Debauchery released. It would be great if I could get them out for the holiday season, but I fear that may be unrealistic.

In the meantime, I have plenty of writing work with Three Gen Media. I can't go into the details, but there's plenty of work as long as I keep delivering quality content. And there's Publish0x, which might be more effective for me if I didn't suck so badly at gathering crypto (that will be a segue into a Thursday post about SAG Mining and Tesla Mining).

Lastly, writing is therapeutic. Most people in Las Vegas express their emotions by cursing, racial slurs, loud music with cursing and racial slurs, and t-shirts with cursing and racial slurs. Those don't work for me. Also, I don't want my brand associated with racial slurs. So instead, I blog. And I work on e-books. And I write for Three Gen Media. And the time flies. If the topic is something that upsets me, then I feel like I've achieved vengeance. If the topic is something else, I tend to forget what angered me in the first place.

Now let's see me try to fit all of this into a tweet, shall we?

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I have 15 years of experience as a software tester. I've been writing off-and-on for 28 years. I adapt quickly to new technologies and new methodologies. And I believe that humor is the most important social skill.

The Loony Liberal's Lampoonery
The Loony Liberal's Lampoonery

The main purpose of this blog is to deliver zany comedy to its readers. There will be occasions, though, where I'll address topics with more seriousness. This blog will include satire, parody, cultural references, and other scribbles that will make you question my sanity.

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