Self-Discipline

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Journaling on the 26th of April, 2022

26 Apr 2022 13 minute read 1 comment fenix-aarizon

Photo by Muhammad Akfi from Pexels Getting ready for the real me "Think positively," the Barista says. These kinds of things are as valuable as donating a few dollars to charity. It won't last long, but it's a kind gesture. Every day seems like I'm t...

Conscious rising from ashes

8 Jun 2022 18 minute read 1 comment fenix-aarizon

We must become conscious of wrongdoing before we are able to create real change in our life. Table of Contents Consciousness of choice Regarding sexuality Consciousness of fear as change Recognizing fear for what it is Saving our self from fear...

What do women want? This From the Ashes

8 May 2022 15 minute read 1 comment fenix-aarizon

Photo of married couple by Tammy Mosley from Pexels This is far removed from the last post in Fenix Mind Dump; one which made me seem like a womanizing, self-interested bloke. That was a cringe post. Never mind it though; I think without the lows of...

Abstaining desire - Fenix Mind Dump

8 May 2022 10 minute read 1 comment fenix-aarizon

Photo by Myicahel Tamburini from Pexels #CringeWarning I'm not sure where I should go from here. Also, this is a Fenix Mind Dump. It's mere scribblings of my wandering mind. Proceed at your own risk. I'm not sure who I am, but I tend to like putting...

Associating the dissociative & what must change.

7 May 2022 8 minute read 2 comments fenix-aarizon

Dissociative states That feeling you get when after someone reminds you of something that feels so distant yet was a mere two days ago. It feels like the experience came from many months or years ago. What is that phenomenon? I think when I experienc...

Men over women & sadism and testing reality

2 May 2022 2 minute read 0 comments fenix-aarizon

I feel the need to publish more and edit less - I think it's a good way to get into the flow of writing more clear & concisely. This one ended on an interesting note. This was not intended to condone or encourage causing others pain. This is a mind d...

Not control as much as a surrender

1 May 2022 2 minute read 0 comments fenix-aarizon

Photo by thanhhoa tran The purpose of being in control of our thoughts (or surrendering them to the right authority (God; not the devil)) go along with knowing when and how to act; not acting out of spite, not acting out of selfishness. The idea is t...

Life is not for people like me, how about you?

1 May 2022 5 minute read 0 comments fenix-aarizon

Photo by Mathias P.R. Reding from Pexels Life is not for people like me, it seems.I've been waiting, for nothing, it seems. There's simply no end to feeling like my life is meaningless. It will always be returning. That deep, darkness lurking - the R...

What am I doing with my life?

29 Apr 2022 5 minute read 0 comments fenix-aarizon

Photo by Roberto Nickson from Pexels I think most people wonder about their own existentialism. Becoming myself I wonder when the day will be that I would be able to relax and be myself while also being able to hang out with someone who wants to be a...

The woman who morphed into a pregnant alien capsule

28 Apr 2022 4 minute read 0 comments fenix-aarizon

Photo by cottonbro I'm releasing this as a rough draft, because - some days it's not that important to me to release something that is well thought out & edited. Enjoy. I had a highly sexual dream experience. Dream sex It started with me feeling like...