A reminder: later on tonight/early tomorrow morning, I'll be posting the first Sermons from Vermin, where my co-host Goth Princess Kay and I will discuss the worst takes from this week's Tweet, You Sinners! digests. With 140 to choose from, narrowing it down to 7 will be a challenge. Nonexistent gods, guide my hands... which you designed in your image because hangnails and eczema are signs of intelligent design. Good job.
And speaking of blatant lack of intelligence, let's look at twenty terrible theist takes!
Fig. 1: #JuggsForJesus
Fig. 2: Welcome to #BRADMERICA, Where IT DIDN'T HAPPEN if BRAD Didn't SEE IT.
Fig. 3: Welcome to #BRADMERICA, Where Everyone's SPIRIT ANIMAL Is the RAVENOUS BUGBLATTER BEAST OF TRAAL.
Fig. 4: Welcome to #BRADMERICA, Where BRAD Grants Himself BRADMUNITY from the RULES He Forces on Others.
Fig. 5: ...What?!?
Fig. 6: Clearly, velva's Tweet Has Been Peer-Reviewed.
Fig. 7: Nice to Know That Refuting the Theory of Evolution is Sacrilege.
Fig. 8: velva Pretends to be godlike... Because jesus?
Fig. 9: Reminder: velva Misspelled "How."
Fig. 10: "Surrealism is Logical When It's in the bible!"
Fig. 11: You Heard It Here: Smokescreen Trolling is a christian Tenet.
Fig. 12: Reminder: velva Claims to be Smarter Than Atheists.
Fig. 13: File This under "Self-Own."
Fig. 14: You Heard it Here: Corroboration and Evidence are Anathema to christianity.
Fig. 15: My Favorite religious Movie is National Lampoon's Animal House.
Fig. 16: So We're Allowed to Pray to Other gods (or None at All). Good to Know.
Fig. 17: #ThoughtsAndPrayers
Fig. 18: Quarter-Circle-Forward is Stronger Evidence Than "knowledge's" Circular Reasoning.
Fig. 19: knowledge thinks that the "D" in PhD stands for "Duh."
Fig. 20: Judging from knowledge's Lack of Response, Hera Exists. Good Luck with Typhon II, Everyone!
And that brings us to 2020-12-02.
If yahweh made these trolls in his image, heaven sounds like an eternal mental ward.
Now you see how... excuse me... "hoe" I may have difficulty picking the seven worst out of a batch of 140. I'll think of one from each blog post.
Stay tuned, true disbelievers!