Consistency is the Boulder That Yahweh Cannot Lift.

Tweet, You Sinners!: Volume 17-07

By LoonyLiberal | Sin City Screwballs | 25 Mar 2022


DISCLAIMER:

I use shorte.st to shorten hyperlinks. I also get a fraction of a cent when people click these links.

I will gladly provide clean links upon request.


I'm actually not in a joking mood today.

Even without my off-again-on-again work on Tweet, You Sinners!, the sheer volume of scorn, ignorance, and arrogance that I see from others is downright exhausting. And, no, focusing on offline pursuits and activities is no respite. One of my roommates here is an unapologetic consumer of Fox News and other right-wing media; he also does not hesitate to treat my fiance like garbage (though, to his credit, he'll back down if I call him out when he's foolish enough to do it in my presence). Virtually everywhere I go in Kingman, "Let's Go Brandon" and similar flags mar the streets and sidewalk; one downtown shop even sells "Kung Flu" merchandise. And thanks to the other gamblers, the prospect of losing money is no longer the worst aspect of the occasional casino visit.

I'm fortunate enough to have a fiance that qualifies as an angel as well as some loyal and clever friends. Still, some days, I find myself spending half a day (or longer) playing games like Chrono Trigger or Inscryption so I can face off against monsters on the other side of the fourth wall.

And speaking of monsters on our side of the fourth wall, here are eighteen terrible theological takes from theist trolls, one both-siderism tweet that I can't fully dismiss, and one damn good pro-Paganism tweet.


Fig. 1: "It's Not Like I Want to Spend Eternity in heaven with You, Baka!"

Fig. 2: Imagine Being So Far Gone As to Support Slavery Just to Pwn the Non-Believers.

Fig. 3: Meet Anathesia, a Troll LARPing as a christian. Otherwise, She'd Know about 2 Thessalonians 3:10.

Fig. 4: Watching Goateater in a Criminal Trial Would be Even More Hilarious.

Fig. 5: "god Exists Because Shut Up or We'll Hurt You!"

Fig. 6: Also -- Where Are Those Talking Snakes?!?

Fig. 7: "Those Silly Atheists, Demanding Proof, Evidence, and Hygiene!"

Fig. 8: To Date, No One Has Taken My "Whale of a Weekend" Challenge.

Fig. 9: Imagine Rounding Down Centuries of christian Violence as "Some christians."

Fig. 10: The Main Difference between Toxic Theists and Toxic Gamers is Centuries of Practice.

Fig. 11: From jesus to jihad in 1,900 Years.

Fig. 12: ...But What Did the Tree Do to Deserve Punishment?

Fig. 13: If a Theist Argues that Lauren is a biblical Plague, I May Have to Concede That Point.

Fig. 14: "Making Shit up" -- a Core Tenet of islam, According to Peace Zone.

Fig. 15: An Argument Can Be Made That Both yahweh and his son/self/whatever Are Deadbeat Dads.

Fig. 16: Worshippers of Athena and Thor Get a Pass, Too.

Fig. 17: "Hello Sir or Madam. Can I Tell You about the True lord and savior -- Already Been Chewed jesus?"

Fig. 18: Tonight, on "Law and Order -- Special Pleading Unit" -- Bad Stuff Isn't Bad When yahweh Does It.

Fig. 19: Don't Get Me Started on Elmer Fudd's Rejected Names.

Fig. 20: #JBberish Wants to be Correct without Actually Being Correct.


And that brings us to 2021-09-15.

Once more for emphasis: I'm actively seeking jobs -- preferably remote/work-from-home -- as either a software tester or a professional writer/proofreader.

I'm fortunate enough that I'm not lacking for essentials like food and shelter. However, I'd like to resume working and to do better than "just getting by." Since my situation isn't dire, I'm not going to ask for handouts. Besides, I can understand how annoying it can be when "My life sucks; send me bucks" posts dominate a social media feed or emailbox. (I have no problem with people selling their goods and services, but when people send me unsolicited "gimme" DMs, my blood pressure rises. When I'm especially cranky, I reply with some variation of, "I have -$25. How much do you want?")

I have fifteen years of experience as a certified software tester (CTAL-TAE, CTAL-TTA, CTAL-TA), and I was a writer and proofreader for Three Gen Media for almost a year. And I can start a new job almost immediately.

I urge anyone who needs a software tester or writer -- or anyone who knows someone that might need a software tester or writer -- to send me an email at [email protected].

This is especially true for anyone who can land me a gig as a detective at the Special Pleading Unit. After all, I have served as an officer in the Grandma Police:

Fig. 21: In Any Other Police Unit, Pinching a Suspect's Cheeks Would be Police Brutality.

Fig. 21: In Any Other Police Unit, Pinching a Suspect's Cheeks Would be Police Brutality.

How do you rate this article?


2

1

LoonyLiberal
LoonyLiberal

I have 15 years of experience as a software tester. I've been writing off-and-on for 28 years. I adapt quickly to new technologies and new methodologies. And I believe that humor is the most important social skill.


Sin City Screwballs
Sin City Screwballs

The purpose of this blog post is to promote the creative works of my collaborators, mutuals, and friends. ...oh, yeah, I may have a few works of my own to share, too. Art, books, audio, video, etc... stay tuned for great entertainment!

Send a $0.01 microtip in crypto to the author, and earn yourself as you read!

20% to author / 80% to me.
We pay the tips from our rewards pool.