Relationships will stress you and that's the truth. As fun and interesting as being a relationship can be, it will stress you and that's why I always tell anyone who cares to listen to go with their heart and their head as well as to build their mental strength to handle things.
Ladies would always act like ladies and that's not an insult. I am saying that because they are extra sensitive and every little detail counts for them. As a guy, you can't say because something didn't bother you then you would assume that it won't bother her. It's a costly assumption to make because it only portrays the guy as insensitive.
Ladies are extra sensitive and of course, we have guys that are extra sensitive too and that's why I like being considerate, putting myself in other people's shoes and then based on how I've known the person, I can then see how the person might act.
There is no love without hate and you can't be in a relationship if you are worried about being hurt. Being in a relationship is also a risk because sometimes you don't know what you might get but I am happy because you can always choose your narrative by the kind of investment you make in that relationship and also by the amount of sacrifice you are willing to make and with who.
You can't be in a relationship and not get hurt. Your partner would hurt you whether deliberately (for some) or not deliberate, most times. If we know better we will do better and sometimes your partner genuinely didn't know and it doesn't mean they are being insensitive, it only means they just didn't know.
You can fall in love with someone this minute and the next minute you are searching your heart to be sure if you still feel the same way especially after seeing some sides to them which you would never have known on the surface. We sometimes think we know everything about someone because of the sudden burst of emotions we feel. There would always be situations that would happen that would make you want to re-evaluate your position. There is a thin line indeed between love and hate so we have to be considerate.
There was this situation that came to mind and I can't help but laugh and also see that we are more sensitive than the other. My friend visited his girlfriend many years ago and decided to stay for a few extra days. He was free but the lady had to go to work and all. So, on this fateful day, my friend waited for her to come but traffic held her. She got home late and my friend was already feeling sleepy.
He attended to her and she complained of having a headache. He went to the kitchen, made noodles for her, boiled water for her to have her bathe. She was having her bathe when the noodles got ready. He served the noodles and he was on the bed, waiting for her to finish her bath when he slept off. She got back, ate the noodles, took her drugs and slept too.
She woke up the next day, angry that her boyfriend doesn't care as much as she would have liked because he slept off before she could get back. My friend was confused and told me. I couldn't help but laugh and I asked him what he did, he said he didn't do anything. She left for work after and that was the start of their crack which eventually led to their break up.
Many people have broken up for something less and that's how a relationship can stress you and you see some unreasonable expectations as well as reasonable ones but you just have to get on with it and be convinced you are both meant for each other because that would make you go to any length for each other.
We all have expectations going into a relationship but we all make mistakes of thinking the other person should make us whole. You are not broken so you should strive to be better on your own and your partner is there to only help and guide you where necessary. We sometimes expect from our partners what we can't do for ourselves. In the story I shared above, the girl expected a guy that would do beyond the normal and this guy obviously expects someone that would appreciate little efforts and then forgive easily.
Before going into a relationship, we need to lay down our expectations for each other. We need to let them know what we expect and they should make us understand what they expect from us. Be honest with yourself and learn to let the person go when you know it's not something you can get through with. The issue is, most people choose their partner based on face value which makes it hard for them to let go when they should have and they end up losing the person to resentments.
Love can give you chaos sometimes and if you find the one for you, you can experience peace - not without its chaos but with more happy moments than bad patches. What's the point in being with someone that makes you walk on eggshells? You can know how deep your love is for someone, only in the moment of crisis but most people who claim they love, exit the stage just when the storm hits. When it comes to the matter of the heart, learn to do what's best for your heart and show consideration to one another.
This post also appeared here and it's my original work on my blog on [Read.Cash](https://read.cash/@Olasquare/relationship-and-stress-abfe723f).
Thank you for your time.
My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.
My tongue is like the pen of a ready writer.
Olawalium; (Love's chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor's order.