Burnt out. Slightly ill. Detached.
These are the words that describe my current mental state. I’ve been spending the past day and a half doing the extra problem for week 1. It’s Luhn’s algorithm. And it’s like 100 times harder than the other problems for this week. Technically, I do not have to complete this to pass this course. So I’ve already decided to drop it for now and will move on to next week’s lecture. But I don’t feel great about not completing everything. I can be a bit of a perfectionist sometimes.
On the whole, I had a productive week. I’m starting to grasp basic concepts like initialization. This used to confuse me quite a bit since I thought it was an algebraic expression. I’m getting better with loops. But there is so much more to learn.
Coding feels like hiking. I initially thought it was similar to running then quickly decided not to because I hate running. I love hiking, not a hard-core kind though mind you, but I don’t love every minute of it. Usually, you’ll need to get up early to arrive where you’ll start the hike. There are bugs and maybe even bears. Bathroom access can be an issue and you’ll eat either packed soggy sandwiches or hockey-arena grade food from local so-called eateries. You’ll be sweaty and gross.
But the air is fresh and the scenery inspiring. And there is such a feeling of satisfaction and well-being at the end of the day. Coding feels like that. Except, I’ve overdone it the past couple of days and am having a mental equivalency of sore muscle. Actually, my eye muscles hurt. Personally, I’m the happiest after three hours of a focused coding session. Do more and I get depressed. I spent more than 12 hours yesterday and about six hours today so no wonder I’m exhausted.
Yea, I should take some break. I have some work to do today and tomorrow, and I’ll watch the week 2 lecture and start on the assignment but won’t force myself to work on it so hard. I know it will get better as long as I keep going, but there are moments when I'm not confident 100%. Oh well. Just keep trying, I suppose.