Photo of man holding onto wooden planks from Unspash.com
For this post and for the first time ever - I'm using Unsplash for the thumbnail. The more I searched on Pexels.com for photos to use, the more I realized Pexels is the gucci of free images. They're too professional looking. As if every photo was the best of the best. Well, sometimes I don't want the best of the best. Sometimes I want normal, average looking subjects.
To the dream then
Crossing a narrow wooden plank, some kids were destined to fall. To where they might be falling to is unknown and we were simply too high in altitude to see a person who might fall to it. It was as though there were two rocks being suspended in the sky, met by one plank which served as a test for those children who attempted to cross.
Where were we?
I had not turned around to see what was behind me, perhaps the rock was somewhere in space, just floating there. I cannot imagine a rock so high that would be above clouds and also be at such a height that it is still attached to Earth, right? I mean, it's a dream so a great part about it is that it doesn't have to make sense. What's there, what's happening is what's important.
It's a dream. Anything could exist or not exist.
The falling boy
One of them must've been a 12 year old. A boy with black-rimmed polyethylene glasses. He fell off the plank and didn't seem to be afraid of falling. As he fell, he was contemplating why I didn't reach out to grab him. He was confused as to what happened, yet wasn't at all thinking about the descension from the plank & rocks he had just fallen from.
There was a particular sense of gravity. Maybe there's more meaning regarding why I didn't help prevent him from falling. It's more that as he was falling, he looked a bit confused, not afraid that he was falling. He didn't scream or yell - he simply fell... To a below, wherever that led, whether to ground below or to another dimension.
As he was falling, and quickly at that, he was looking at me with a face of confusion like, "What's happening? Why am I falling? Why didn't you help me cross the plank?" He got so small as to be forgotten, but it was not as if he died - he literally fell away into a void of a distance.
We must've been so high in altitude, below were only clouds covering a landscape. I definitely saw that a landscape as brown below. Details of it all looked like a Grand Canyon or some other desert. We were so high though, it seemed impossible to see where he fell to.
About the boy
I think a boy falling down to nothing was me losing my sense of self from where I am at currently as well as what I've achieved in the past - seeing myself, in a sense, fall away from my own objective success.
The power of memories,
informing the conscious mind
I fell away from the true & righteous path (the narrow plank) and I was doing so over a course of many years; it took a long time to watch myself fall away (as I watched him, the boy fell for several seconds in the dream).
In this dream, I feel my childhood is beginning to fall away from the current state of awareness I am in in my adult life. A child in me falls away and yet I stay to observe the others who are working hard on maintaining their place.
I feel the boy who fell from the plank was how my subconscious projected the sense of me falling away from my truth over the course of the last several years. It was in that glimpse of my past, my subconscious or "God," one could say, was informing my conscious mind that, "Hey, you've fallen away. You feel it, you know what it means now. It's time to change. It's time to repent."
Drawing focus to girls now
The sake of identity, not that names matter I will name the younger girl Jackie who was seven years old and the older girl Scarlett who was nine years old. They're random names which are easier than saying "younger girl" and "older girl."
There were two girls. One who needed help, Jackie who was struggling to manage a climb after falling off the plank to just barely grasp the face of the rock we were to sit on. The other, Scarlett had been pulling with all her might to help Jackie who had stumbled and was bound to fall into the void, like the boy.
Strength through intelligence
I noticed Scarlett had pushed her hand thru a hole from one side of Jackie's zippered winter jacket (the kind you'd wear in snow), to the other side. It was a hole in the mesh & cloth from the left side of her chest to the right side, a hole which I didn't see Scarlett cut out, but was just there, existing as it was.
I thought, "Hm, how smart. Now Scarlett helping Jackie can use the full support of mesh & cloth of a jacket to support Jackie's weight. Doing so reduces the chance of losing Jackie due to a weaker grip on just the outside of her jacket."
Scarlett had obviously been struggling to pull up Jackie. She had been pulling toward herself rather than upward. Jackie, in need of assistance, must've been about seven years old while Scarlett, the one trying to pull Jackie up & over to the place we sat, must've been about nine.
What happened, I think, was Jackie was walking across the plank and fell just before a place where a plank met some rock we were sitting on.
Scarlett was using all of her arm strength to lift up another was misapplying her strength as she was trying to pull Jackie toward herself rather than lift her up & over a side of rock she had slipped down to. It was obvious one must lift upward rather than toward them self.
In regards to the girls
Wait wait wait... There were two girls; one helping another. I wonder if they are dream symbols of two women in my life who are helping each other overcome - maybe the barista and her best friend. Maybe - oh my there is so much here. This is becoming more complex than I initially considered.
The fact there are two girls of similar age reminds me of the barista and her best friend. They seem to pull each other up. I don't know which one is older than the other, but it does seem like the fact they were struggling on my rock, too - my subconscious mind considers that they are symbols reflecting a similar meaning of what it means to watch the boy fall off the plank.
While children seem to overcome little things in life more aptly, one reality is that one could make some major mistakes in their judgment such as one or many missteps that lead to spiritually falling away. Men & women both being human, experience the same downfalls to falling away from their high spirit self or "God."
It seems Scarlett trying to help Jackie up & over the rock face means they too are struggling with the reality that gravity (perhaps sin, in this case) is pulling them back to the world in ways that we can presume they too are struggling, in similar ways that I see in myself.
On one hand I see a form of myself falling away from the path that is the true me (struggle for to cross the plank, to ascend), and on the other, I see two girls; one is preventing another from falling. Perhaps I see two girls (or women) in my life who are trying to help each other not fall off the plank. Could this be so? Scarlett was not allowing Jackie to fall, but was having a difficult time about it, regardless.
That could mean I see them as struggling, yet for myself, I continue to fall because I think I have no one to keep me from falling. Maybe the correlation between the boy who fell (who I feel is me) and the girls helping each other is to show that, had the person I am now, reached out the the me who was falling, perhaps I would save myself from falling off the path of righteousness.
The fact that I do not get involved with what I am seeing, that Scarlett is helping Jackie, or that the boy began to and continued to fall away from the plank & rocks we were on, could have a similar relation as to the relationship I have with the barista and her best friend in my waking life; I'm not here to get involved - they are symbols of what I could have with someone; a best friend; a battle buddy. Who knows? I'm done over-analyzing this dream.
Be what it may, I will remember this one and look for new connections in how I relate to others & to myself.
This is Fenix Dream Journal