It's Funny Because It's True.

#SatoshisSaturday: 2021-01-30

By LoonyLiberal | Dollars and Nonsense | 30 Jan 2021


TRIGGER WARNING: Foul language, scam alerts, exaggeration for comedic purposes.


DISCLAIMER 1:

The links to the crypto sites in this article are affiliate links. Furthermore, I use shorte.st to shorten hyperlinks. I get a few cents when users click the links, and I get rewarded if users register using these links. However, my personal experiences with these sites have been beneficial enough that I can promote them without feeling like a shill.

I will gladly provide clean links upon request.

DISCLAIMER 2:

This article is not a "get rich quick" article. This refers to sites and strategies which I personally use. It is entirely possible that my actions and subscriptions could lead to financial loss. As such, constructive criticism and suggestions are always welcome.


*siiiiigh*

On paper, #SatoshisSaturday made sense. Invest a little to earn a lot over a long period of time.

Reality is bitchslapping me pretty hard in response.

The trifecta of scams, fees, and lousy customer service have me just about ready to give up on cryptocurrency completely. I'd still like to blog here, if for no other reason that one blog post here gets more views that a large majority of my blog did on Blogger. However, I feel like I'd be better off using my money as toilet paper instead of as investments in crypto.

In the meantime, here's what my imperiled portfolio looks like:


  1. Browse with Brave Browser

    Even without the BAT as incentive, it's a decent browser, so I'll likely stick with it even if I abandon cryptocurrency completely.

  2. Play Crytpo Mining Game at least three times a day

    I'm considering giving up on this game. The artwork is still great, but it feels like a chore more often than not, and the lack of progress is discouraging.

  3. Check Publish0x at least three times a day

    Admittedly, I've been lax in my blogging. I have reasons, but they sound like whiny excuses when I try to verbalize or write them out, so I'll spare my readers the details.

  4. Spend at least $10/week buying stocks on Cash App

    Yes, I admit that I'm casually following Wallstreetbets in case a potential microinvestment pops up. Even without Wallstreetbets, though, Cash App's cash card boosts, ease of money transfers, and ability to buy fractions of stocks make investing easy. Yes, I'll need another app if I want access to the full range of stocks, but I have enough picks on my watchlist to invest in some micro-Socially-Responsible-Investments. I currently own a fraction of a stock of Sprouts Farmers Market, which is as good of a start as any.

  5. Buy at least one bond a week from Worthy Financial

    Every 8 bonds leads to $0.01/day in interest. And I currently own 8 bonds. Kick-ass!

  6. Build interest on BlockFi

    No changes here; I'm getting interest, but not enough to pass the $0.01/day threshold.

  7. Build interest on FreeBitco.in

    My balance earns me 27 satoshis/day. That's not enough to clear the $0.01/day threshold, but it's roughly 90% of a cent. One more significant deposit should put this account on the scoreboard.

  8. Invest occasionally in Hedged Bitcoin

    I've lost about $2 so far, which is roughly a 5% dip. However, that might be due to BTC dropping from $40K to $33K, so I'm not panicking yet. Also, Brave sends my BAT directly to Uphold, so passing that crypto to Hedged Bitcoin is simpler than trying to export it to my wallet.

To calculate my daily total, I'm being purposely pessimistic. I'm only counting income that is reasonably guaranteed. I'm excluding all games until/unless I can demonstrate steady, provable, passive income. I'm also excluding currency that cannot currently be spent, such as RX Coin.

Figures are based on values as of 2021-01-30 11:56pm PST:

  • The price of 1 BTC was $33,835.49.

Worthy Financial
$0.01/day

Yup.

A penny a day.

Is it any wonder why I'm a curmudgeon over crypto?

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LoonyLiberal
LoonyLiberal

I have 15 years of experience as a software tester. I've been writing off-and-on for 28 years. I adapt quickly to new technologies and new methodologies. And I believe that humor is the most important social skill.


Dollars and Nonsense
Dollars and Nonsense

Are you familiar with the phrase "funny money?" Finances are no laughing matter unless we make jokes about them. The purpose of this blog is to put a comedic slant on anything related to finances. Cryptocurrency, dollars, stocks, golden parachutes... if it goes ka-ching, I'll make it guffaw.

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