As a community the transgender community has had to fight our asses off to get the most basic of rights. We have day to day struggles, discrimination and fear that other people do not have. I want to recognize that fight and bravery that every single transgender person goes through every day. I also need to say that some of us are fucking the rest of us up.   

To start I want to say as a community it is important to have pride in who we are, take up space and let the world know we do exist. In my opinion, and I say in my opinion because I am one voice out of many, we are doing it wrong. How are we fucking up? Let me explain my viewpoint. Before I go any further this is my personal opinion, but it is backed with facts and vast platonic relationships with other woman.   

First – I had to specify platonic relationship. Why? Because in modern day we can't say anything without people assuming shit. They need the specifics and quite frankly I shouldn’t because it’s none of your damn business. The transgender community seems to be obsessed with labels. CIS, Trans, Nonbinary and more. I'm not saying these labels don’t help identify who we are and help us find a community that matches us. The thing is these labels are becoming our identity in full, and we are asking others to use them. No, not everyone is asking that and In understand that. My disagreement is with the ones who feel the need to label everything. My mom and aunts are CIS woman, I am a trans woman, my dad is a CIS man my friend is a transgender man. We expect to be called a male or female, man or woman and want to be included in all societal meanings of these words, but WE AS A COMMUNITY are SEGREGATING OURSELVES and then add a new label “CIS” to those who never asked to be identified separately. We want to be called man or woman but then call ourselves transgender man or transgender woman or MTF or FTM or any variation. We then wonder why we are segregated by society – newsflash we are doing it to ourselves. I'm not trying to crush anyone's self-identity, but most people in society know we are transgender unless we get an absurd amount of surgery, and quite frankly with the poverty level of most transgender people surgery is not an option. In my personal experience I just say I'm a woman, and I go in womans restrooms, shop at womans stores and don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks. I am a transgender woman, and that needs to be known by my doctors, and my husband, but I am a woman to everyone else. Point. Blank. Period. The only people who need to know I'm transgender are the ones I chose to come out to. Sure, society will likely figure it out on their own, but why do I need to tell them? A gay man doesn't approach people with “Hi I'm john and I'm gay” he doesn't later announce he is gay at a work meeting, none of that occurs. If he does that’s his prerogative and he is fucking himself by being extremely unprofessional as that information is not something anyone in the workplace needs to know, but people really don’t care, and if they do, they will ask. You want to be accepted as a man or woman? Then say you are a man or woman.  You are a strong, powerful man or woman. Period.   

We are trying to make CIS gender people identify as CIS gender and let me be, possibly, the first to break your heart with the news that, IT IS NOT SOCIETYS JOB TO MAKE YOU COMFORTABLE....IT IS YOURS AND YOURS ALONE. Woman specifically have fought for millennia just to be seen as equal and still are often not. They are proud to say “I am a woman” and then some in our community come along want them to segregate themselves into CIS? That’s absurd and unfair. You want to be part of their identity but want to segregate their identity from yours? People are not going to make that effort for you, and you are not above that person, so trying to force that person to change how they identify from a woman/man to a CIS woman/man is pushing it further that I am okay with it being pushed. We can't expect to be seen as the same if we identify differently on the level of gender. 

Unpopular opinion – Transgender woman should not be seen on tampon advertisements. Makeup I understand, but there are some things no amount of surgery will every make a transgender woman need – like a tampon. We cannot take what is unique to biological (I mean scientifically born as with chromosomes) from these women. Periods are hard as fuck on a woman, some science making them equivalent to a heart attack. A transgender woman, although just a woman, does not have periods – in any way. Our hormone regimes keep hormones at a consistent level, and our body does not bleed out once a month. The fact we are trying to take periods away from woman who experience them is wrong and downright degrading. How would you feel if Joe Biden said he knew exactly what you were going through and advertised a product just for you? Let's be real you would think it was insulting, demeaning and out of line and demand for him to be cancelled. We have got to stop trying to force ourselves into things we don’t belong in. Why do we have to belong in that for you to feel like a woman? That’s a personal issue many need to face before transition. You will not be capable of periods, a uterus, childbirth or things in that category. If you are not okay with that and a doctor has you on hormones, you need a new doctor because the doctor has failed to give you reasonable expectations and your life is in danger because your doctor is an idiot. We have to stop stepping on the toes of everyone simply for an agenda because we are pissing people off and digging our own graves. Is it unfair the struggle we have? Sure, but let's not back pedal and create enemies out of people who would have otherwise not been bothered by us until we started placing ourselves in things, we truly do not have a business in. 

Let's not shit on advocates life sacrifice and work because we want to be in a commercial for a product that doesn't apply to us, and we have no relation to. Let stop creating more labels that aren't necessary. It’s time our community gets a reality check, and if we don’t, we are headed towards our demise. You don’t have to agree, and that’s okay. This is my perspective.  

For those new to my blog let me say I am here for you. I am in school for law, so that one day I will be able to fight for our community on a larger scale. You have someone on your side. I love you all. You are all worthy, seen, heard, capable and enough.   

I also want to mention the ones in our community who have been killed for existing. Celebrate for them today. If you know any of them say their name and do not let them, be forgotten! 

I'm putting some links below for you to check out and remember You are NOT alone. You ARE worthy. You ARE capable. You ARE deserving. You ARE seen. You ARE heard. You ARE loved. You ARE appreciated. You ARE Enough.  

I cant wait to see how amazing your story turns out <3 - Regina  

If you are suicidal, feel like hurting yourself or know someone who is Call or text 988 

For Trans or LGBT Youth I suggest  you check out Youth outright here - I participated in them in my teenage years and they can be a wonderful place to find support or meet friends. If the hyperlink doesn't work copy and paste https://www.youthoutright.org/  

If you need immediate support in a time of crisis, please contact Trans Lifeline - at 877-565-886  

A simple google search is often the best way to find support, answers, and those who are like you.  

If you liked what you read follow me! Feel free to tip as it helps me, but do not feel obligated. I appreciate you taking the time to read what I had to say and hope it helped someone, even if it's only one.