One thing I find that nearly ever marriage I've ever seen has in common is 2 people still acting like individuals fighting one another and trying to prove they're right to get their way or prove a point. The whole point of marriage is 2 becoming 1. So if we want to have any success in marriage and get what God promised for our marriage, peace and joy, we have to adopt the right mindset and think about it God's way. For my marriage that has meant when I want to defend myself, instead I ask my wife a question to seek to understand before i seek to be understood. Sometimes when i want to argue my point, i can tell she just needs to be held, so i hug her. When my wife's upset about something and distant instead of being focused on how im feeling because of it and asking, "did I do something wrong," or "is everything ok," in an irritated voice that communicates I'm more concerned about what I'm feeling than what's hurting you right now, I write her a letter telling her how much I love her or hug her and ask if she's ok gently and lovingly.
Tell your wife how much you love her a ton. Serve her and do something kind like rub her feet or tell her how special she is when you don't feel close and everything inside of you wants to shut down out of fear of being rejected.